Ram, an extremely choosy boy who was very particular about anything he wanted and would try to adjust, but if it went against his comfort he wouldn’t like it.
Ram has been wearing spectacles for the last 10 years and now he wanted a new pair of spectacles. So Ram, asked his sister, to join him along in the purchase process. They visited 7 stores saw different frames but Ram did not like any frame, then they walked into this fancy big store which seemed the best place to buy the frame.
The Manager measured Ram’s eye power and then asked him the problem he was facing with the current frame. Ram described to the manager the kind of frame he was looking for and then with a full swing, they started the process of seeing different frames. Initially, the frames came up as per something that Ram wanted, but then the manager started showing him other options which could be better, then out of 10 frames Ram narrowed it down to 3 frames, he took more time than an average person would have taken, he wanted everything precise a half metal frame, lightweight and box styled lens. His sister did not lose hope but wanted him to narrow it down fast. The shop owner saw that the customer had invested so much time so he definitely wanted to win over the customer, thus now even he becomes a part of the decision-making process, can you see just to buy a frame of Rs. 3000 - 5000, four involved, then Ram thought he should video call his mom too and ask her. Now, the owner used his marketing skills to the best and persuaded Ram by telling you should go for something new, this look’s classy on you and don’t worry even if you don’t like it you I shall take it back. Now, Ram was confused, his heart said that he shouldn’t go for this frame but he thought let’s give it a try and now as Ram had stated to the merchandiser that using his older frame he was not able to sit in front of the computer for long hours and his eyes were straining. Ram chose the best type of lens for himself which was almost three times the value of his regular lens but he knew it was worth investing in it as it saved him from a headache and increased his productivity and efficiency. Now after some bargaining, the deal was closed but as Ram walked out after a long three-hour decision-making process, his heart yet was conceived with the frame.
After a few days, the frame was ready and Ram collected it from the shopkeeper. He wore it for a few days but yet he wasn’t feeling comfortable and his head was paining more as the frame seemed heavier than the previous one. Thus, Ram decided that he would return the product, now he was left with a lens which wouldn’t fit easily in some other frame. Had Ram followed his heart and intuition he wouldn’t have landed in this situation, now again he had to redo the entire process, but this time he had decided that if he doesn’t get the exact type or something which is 99% similar to what he wants he wouldn’t go ahead and will not spend time on looking for other options. So Ram revisited the different stores but now the challenge was he needed a frame which would go with the lens he already had, he tried hard but did not get a frame, then the store which he had visited earlier pitched to buy a new frame and was ready to offer it at half the price but as Ram did not like the frame he walked off, Now, Ram used his last resort he knew off a store which was far away from his place of residence but he had liked a few frames there earlier so he decided to visit it.
Now, Ram had decided mentally that today he will get the frame he wants no matter how much time, effort or money it takes. He walked in the store and again the process was something similar to the earlier one, but the only difference was Ram knew this time the things he doesn’t have to do, thus if the shop owner went off track by showing a new variety he told him no this is not something I am looking for. This time his dad accompanied him but he left in the middle assuming that Ram would take longer and thus asked him to finalize on his own. Finally, after flipping through many boxes the perfect frame was found, a blue light metal half frame, something exactly which Ram wanted. He made a few trials and then decided to buy it.
There are many takeaways from this incident but I would like to highlight a few key ones. First, we should clearly define the objective or purpose for doing anything and have a scope defined and the boundary till where we are comfortable in experimenting or is suitable for us. This step is important so that we do not waste time on options we do not want to work upon and waste our precious time, some of you would argue by saying we should have alternate Plan B but I feel our alternate Plan B should also be a plan which uses another method in achieving the primary goal.
We should chart out our decision-making process, this is extremely important as at times we could forget some key elements. Like in the case of Ram he could have checked online for the frame, he wanted. The decision-making process helps us to channelize the information in making a more sound judgment, we should know the factors that are important for us and things which are a must be.
Like lately, I have seen people deciding an MBA college just on the basis of the package it is offering and they brand it as a good or bad college, I agree the package is important but there are other things too like faculty, culture on campus etc.
We get distracted or might give up if circumstances aren’t working in our favor. At times, it is ok to not take a decision immediately, if you’re confused. One should take the required time one wants but it should be taken in case that one does not procrastinate the decision and form a habit of being indecisive all the time. One should always be alert and try to live in the present moment to make effective decisions.
I have often heard and at times said it myself, I wish I had done…., first there is no point in living in the past it shall cause you more harm. Second, the decision which you have taken is now your frame, now you need a good lens to help you see better. So try if there is something that can help you achieve the goal if not then change the frame if possible, (change your decision) and start a new beginning. If you live with past regrets, you shall never be able to live in the present.
Intuition, your inner voice might at times give you the best decision for a particular circumstance. One must try listening to it and follow your heart. One very important message, we should avoid doing the same mistake again, learn from the experience and next time when a similar situation arises you should know the don’ts.
We also need to learn not to become dependent on someone’s opinion and learn to take decisions on our own, we should listen to everyone but do the thing which we feel is correct. Patience is the key if we take a wrong decision there is an additional cost incurred always, thus we must weigh the pros & cons always. It is good to be precise and clear in life, then to be I’m comfortable with anything, because then our attitude becomes like that and we shall just accept whatever life has to give us we shall never define our roadmap to the destination we want to reach but at the same time we should also be adjusting and have an open mind to take unbiased decisions.
The last takeaway from this article, for all people in their twenties, try making a mind map of the things that you really want in your life. It might take time 1 week to 1 year but it is worth it, once you know what you want you automatically make swift decisions because if you have designed a frame (things you want to achieve) and lens (methods or steps to be taken to reach the goal) on your own, then the universe makes sure you get the right frame from its optician.